Thursday, 2 August 2012

Phrases I'm Trying To Start

You know those things you say that you wish other people would too? Well these are mine. Feel free to leave yours in the comments below.

"Who stamped on [your/her/his] goldfish?" The alternative to 'who pissed on your chips' that's so ridiculously horrible you can't help but laugh. It's also less soggy sounding.

"Clam bake" Like a sausage fest but y'know, with women. Mostly used to describe my own fiction when I forget to put male characters in.

#FeministRage Sometimes someone says something so offensive you couldn't even list everything that was wrong with it, let alone fit it into 140 characters. Happily #FeministRage lets everyone know you're pissed off without eating up your word limit.

#MorriganDisapproves What's worse than some randomer off Twitter disagreeing with you? The disapproval of a fictional apostate of course. Not only does she have the confidence necessary to wear a flimsy scarf as a shirt (and you need confidence for a really withering put down), she can also drain the life force of people who disagree with her.

#LearnToSpell Like the above but meant to combat bad spelling/grammar instead of misogyny.
Fifty Shades of Greyjoy Basically it's what would have happened if Esgred was who she said she was. It's cute because Theon thinks he's Christian Grey.*
It might also look something like this:

*Admittedly Fifty Shades of Greyjoy becomes less funny when you know about the stuff that goes down with the Boltons.

** Or possibly funnier, if you're a socipath.

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